University brings out the weird in everyone…
26 Things Every Student Has Done But Won’t Admit To
1. Stolen your flatmate’s food.
2. Used their toiletries because they seem nicer and fancier than yours and you kinda want to know what they smell like.
3. Slept with someone questionable and swore blind that you did nothing more than kiss.
4. Ate out of date food because you’re lazy and poor.
5. Wrote a fake date when referencing your essay so your lecturer wouldn’t suspect that you did it the night before.
6. Made up a fake reference in your essay because the quote was really good but you couldn’t remember where you found it.
7. Stolen toilet paper from a public loo, then hidden your stash from your housemates. Because that stuff is expensive.
8. Vomited somewhere and pretended it wasn’t you.
9. Spilled a drink and left a stain and swore it wasn’t you.
10. Saw your tutor in the corridor and ran in the opposite direction.
11. Handed in an essay late and made up an elaborate lie to get an extension.
12. “Accidentally” lost your friends on a night out so you could pull.
13. “Accidentally” lost your friends on a night out so you could go home early.
14. Left a lecture during the break and just didn’t come back.
15. Lied about your entire history and personality during a game of ‘I have never’.
16. Told a white lie to make yourself sound more interesting during Freshers’ Week. But everyone remembered and you realised you’ll have to keep up the charade forever.
17. Went into a shop, looked at an item, saw the price tag, had a mild heart attack, but pretended to consider the purchase so the shop assistant didn’t realise how broke you are.
18. Taken a book from the library that everyone else needed and didn’t even read it.
19. Got a really good mark on a piece of work that you didn’t even make an effort for.
20. Got a really crap mark on a piece of work you spent hours on and then subsequently pretended that you didn’t try anyway.
21. Went to a lecture still slightly drunk.
22. Attended an event simply because you knew there would be free food/alcohol.
23. Eaten an entire jar of Nutella for dinner.
24. Claimed to have read certain books to sound more intelligent. Then gone home and read the Wikipedia page in case anyone ever asks you about it.
25. Walked past that person you made friends with during Freshers’ Week but pretended you didn’t see them because the constant awkward hellos are making you anxious.
26. Identified with a shameful amount of points on this list.